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Dear Bonnie: I was wondering when you think is a good time for a person to have a reading. My father passed, leaving a lot of unanswered questions. Can a loved one in heaven have a regret? — Louie

Dear Louie: The time to go for a reading can be different for everyone. If a client coming for a reading is not ready to open their heart and listen to the message or is still in a state of deep grief, then the sitting and the message might be a hard one for the medium and the client.

A reading can be a very emotional experience. Just hearing the thoughts and memories that a loved one on the other side is bringing through to the medium can stir so many emotions. Some might be ready to deal with these emotions, and some might need some more time to pass before they are able to receive the communication.

The medium is there not to add words or feelings but to be the go-between for the communicator on the other side and the person coming in for the reading. The medium represents the voice of the spirit world.

That being said, many clients come in with the idea of receiving answers to questions surrounding a person’s death or a situation that is happening. Many times, a client will get the information they have been seeking, and this will bring them peace of mind. But not always do the loved ones on the other side want to talk about their passing or a situation they know is going to upset you, as they know how it is going to affect you.

Mediums cannot make family members or friends on the other side speak about a subject they do not want to talk about. You must remember your loved one on in the spirit world still has the same personality, including dislikes and behaviors. If they were not chatty or didn’t like to talk about certain things (funny because I just realized I have never had someone coming through talking about politics), then the medium might not receive the information you are looking for.

Recently, I had a client, and as soon as she sat down, her grandmother came through, a delightful lady who gave her so many details and evidence of her life and told her how much she was loved and left her with many family memories. The message at the beginning of the reading had many intense emotions and memories for my client, so many that she began to shut down, telling me she did not feel loved by her family, and she started to become emotional. But the client then wanted to take over the conversation and began to talk about her brother and the problems he was causing her in the family. The sweet grandmother did not want to talk about this subject, and the client became agitated.

If you come to a reading having no expectations of what you think your loved ones in heaven should talk about, then you will be pleasantly surprised. If you’re waiting for them to say that one magical word or talk about something in the family that is going on and you just want them to agree with you, then you could be disappointed even though the medium has done a fantastic job of bringing the loved one through.

Can our loved ones in heaven have regrets? Yes, of course. Just as we can have these emotions while here on Earth, our loved ones can look back on their life here and see what they could have, or maybe should have, done a little bit better.

Lots of dads come through telling me they wish they would have spent more time with my children, went out and played ball with their sons, or went to their daughters’ dance recitals. They convey to me often that they thought they were doing the right thing working all the time and making money to support their family. They were taught that they were responsible for their family’s financial well-being and did not realize they were losing precious time and memories.

You are ready to go for a reading when you’re prepared to have a conversation with the person you are missing and to feel their presence around you, but do not require them to reveal certain things that you might think are important and they might not. If a person in the spirit world wants to talk about difficult times and circumstances, they will bring it to the attention of the medium, who can then give you the information.

If you are missing someone from your life who is in heaven and you are open to receiving information that is given to you, you will love sitting in the presence and feeling your loved one around you. It is a magical time when you’re in a sitting, and it feels like a natural conversation you might have had over a cup of coffee.

Bonnie Page is a psychic medium and spiritual life coach. She is available for private sessions by Zoom, Facetime or phone at 978-297-9790. If you would like to ask Bonnie a question for her column, email her at or